The winter doldrums have definitely set in. If you, too, suffer from seasonal depression, then you get it. The fun and excitement of the holidays are over, and I’m worn out from the festivities and dealing with my kids’ frequent sicknesses. I’m never a cold or snow lover, but it’s especially depressing January through March when it’s not even adding to the ambience of a white Christmas.

Every single year I question why I still live in Northern Utah. (I already know the answer, though: family. If it weren’t for wanting to live close to family, I would have high-tailed it to another state—preferably southern California—long ago. OK, family AND cost of living. 😉)

Anyway, it’s safe to say that this isn’t my favorite time of year. A couple of weeks ago I had several days in a row when I just felt “off”. I kept trying to figure out why, but I couldn’t pinpoint anything. It wasn’t until one of my friends posted on Facebook about her own seasonal depression that the lightbulb went on. Of course I was feeling a bit down! I frequently feel a bit sad, unsettled, and/or unmotivated at this time of year.

Last week my life coach also reminded me that I have a history of some traumatic events happening in January. My twins were born extremely prematurely on January 10th, and Lincoln was diagnosed with leukemia on January 23rd. Bundle all of these things together, and it’s no wonder I’ve been feeling a little less than bubbly lately.

If there’s one thing working with my coach has taught me, though, it’s that we all have SO MUCH MORE CONTROL over our lives than we may think we do. Back before I started working with Robyn, I would inwardly roll my eyes when I heard something like that. I’d start drafting a counterargument in my head.

Now, though…? I’ve seen and experienced the truthfulness that I’m in control of my own life. The circumstances of my life didn’t change much last year. The way I feel thanks to my mindset shifts, though, is night and day. I needed to be reminded of that.

I can’t change the dreary weather or the fact that January brings up some triggering memories, but I CAN choose to focus on doing more of what makes me happy. What has historically pulled me out of a slump at this time of year? PLANNING VACATIONS!!!!

I desperately need something to look forward to when the world is dreary outside. Pretty much every year sometime between January and March, I start having major wanderlust. That, of course, leads me to daydreaming and Pinterest. I start obsessively pinning travel ideas to add to my Bucket List board, and before you know it, I’ve planned one or two delightful trips that I just have to convince Josh into taking with me. 😉

I’m happy to report that Josh and I are now planning two amazing family trips for this year: one to St. Simons Island, Georgia in June and one to Gatlinburg, Tennessee in October. We’ve been both places before and loved them. I’m so excited!!

Unfortunately, though, they still seem a long way off. I want to get out of the cold before it’s summer and the warm weather has found me in northern Utah. However, between our family vacations, holiday plans for the end of the year, and a surgery he needs to have next month, Josh doesn’t have more available days off at work.

Enter: Girls’ Trip Planning!!

Back in October I went to a “Moms’ Weekend Out” retreat with my life coach and some of her other clients. I actually wrote about it a bit before in a blog post. While there, we struck up a conversation about nights out and trips with girlfriends. I don’t often go out with my girlfriends, but I love it when I do. Craft nights, book club nights, dinners out, overnight trips, retreats—they always boost my spirits and refuel my soul. To my utter shock, I was in the minority among the women on the Moms’ Weekend Out retreat. Several of the others had NEVER been on a girls’ night, overnighter, and/or retreat before. If you’re in that same boat, that needs to change, my friend! ❤️

I’m going to talk about reasons moms, in particular, need to go on a girls’ trip because that’s the season of life I’m in. It’s equally important for you to take these vacays if you’re single and/or don’t have kids, though. Everyone needs a break from the daily grind!

Six Reasons You Should Go on a Girls’ Trip

#1: There’s no reason to fear.

It was almost comical when we started talking at my Moms’ Weekend Out retreat about fears we’d had before coming. It turned out that every single one of us—all seven of us there at the time—had been afraid of coming for one reason or another. Some were worried about what others would think of them. Some were worried about not fitting in. Some were worried about leaving their families for a whole weekend.

Here’s the thing, though… WE HAD NOTHING TO FEAR! We were all able to be ourselves and have a grand time together, and more and more worries melted away as the weekend progressed. No one was left out. All of our children and all of our spouses survived without us.

We’d all been worried, and we’d all thought we were the only one stressing. Not so. We are all so much more alike than we are different! Have you ever thought about going on a girls’ overnighter or retreat before but decided not to because of anxiety? Take a deep breath, and go on the trip anyway.

#2: You’ll learn.

This is especially true if you’re going on some sort of retreat or to a conference, but you will learn things on any kind of night(s) out with your friends. While I was on both of the retreats I’ve been on recently (Moms’ Night Out and one for Utah cancer moms), I took pages and pages of notes and insights. Being away from my responsibilities allowed me time to reflect and journal, connecting dots that I don’t have enough time (or silence) to do normally. If you’re simply having a fun night or weekend away with your girlfriends, you will have time to learn more about each other, and your talks will give you different views and perspectives to consider. That leads right into the next reason.

#3: You’ll make/strengthen friendships.

I’m going to go ahead and assume that if you’re choosing to spend time away from your family, you at least sort of like whomever you’ll be spending time with. 😉 No matter how long you’ve known your girlfriends, spending a lot of quality time together always gives you an opportunity to grow closer. If you don’t know all—or even any—of the people you’ll be going with, then time away together gives you the opportunity to make new friends. We all know that those chances are fewer and further between the older we get.

#4: You’ll be able to relax, free from your everyday responsibilities.

When was the last time you literally only had to worry about yourself? Probably way too long. Every time I go on an overnighter with girlfriends, I have the same experiences at the beginning and at the end. As I’m driving solo to the rendezvous destination, I’m a mixture of being unbelievably excited for some carefree time, and I’m already missing my boys and Josh. Motherhood is so weird! 😂 As I’m packing up my things to check out of the hotel or rental property at the end, I’m always blown away by how easy it seems. I feel like I’m missing something even though I’m not. Traveling by yourself—without innumerable kids and pieces of luggage to keep track of—is so easy! It feels like cheating.

And that’s just going to and coming home from the trip. On the trip? You can go to the bathroom when you need to—without a miniature “assistant” accompanying you! You can order whatever food you want AND eat it while it’s still warm (or cold if you order a salad 😉)! You can talk and laugh as loudly as you want without worrying about waking children up! You can sleep in!!!! It’s glorious.

#5: The cost is worth it.

Listen—I get it. Many of you don’t have a ton of expendable income. You might feel guilty about spending your family’s money on something some might view as “selfish”. Here’s the thing, though: Sometimes it’s hard for moms to take care of their own needs, but it is absolutely necessary! I know you’ve heard this before, but it bears repeating: You can’t pour from an empty cup. Do yourself a favor and really, truly think about how much a trip away from your family—even for just one night—would benefit you. When you feel good, it’s easier to make others feel good. You will have fun, make memories, and feel reenergized and refreshed. You will return home a better, happier wife and mom.

#6: You deserve it.

GOING ON A GIRLS’ TRIP IS NOT SELFISH!!!! If my last reason didn’t convince you, then let me paint another picture for you. I’m going to talk directly to stay-at-home moms now. (If that title doesn’t describe you, then just insert your own list of tasks in place of mine.) Day in and day out, you get up (often/usually before anyone else) and spend MUCH of your day doing anything and everything you can to help your family. You change diapers, potty train, wipe noses, dress, and feed your offspring. You clean the house. You do laundry. You make sure there’s food in the house. You pay bills. You get your kids to school and help them do their homework. And, remember, this is all inside the home for your family. If you also have a job and/or you serve in your community, your list grows exponentially.

Yes, every woman’s list looks a little different, but you get the picture. We deserve to go on girls’ trips. We’ve earned it. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

JUST GO!!!

Have I convinced you yet? Do it. Book the trip. Leave your cares behind, and go have fun with your girlfriends. Send this article to a girlfriend (or two or three), and convince her/them to go with you! Then come back here and tell me where y’all went. I’m going to get back to my trip planning and messaging my own girlfriends now. 😘